How many people do you know who claim to be good listeners but, in reality, aren’t?
True, and active, listening demands effort — and there are a lot of obstacles. Distractions, our attitudes towards the speaker or topic, and even our physical state (e.g., hunger or fatigue) can all interfere.
But the biggest problem is that we often start thinking about what we’re going to say before the speaker even finishes.
So, here’s a challenge for you: try to be a better listener for the next week.
Pay attention to how often you start thinking about your response before the speaker is done. If it’s a lot, remind yourself to stay present. Be quiet, let the speaker talk, and don’t think about how you want to respond right away. Wait until you’ve had a chance to fully understand what they’re saying.
Oh, and eliminate those distractions you personally have control over (such as your phone or smartwatch).
Did you know that we typically comprehend and retain only 25% of what we hear? Compounding this is the distracted digital world we inhabit, making us all poor listeners at times.
However, there are steps you can take to enhance your listening skills. The initial step is to remind yourself to truly listen so that you can stay present and allow yourself to genuinely comprehend what the speaker is communicating to you.
Never underestimate the power of making another person feel heard — and understood.
Michael Piperno is a communication coach and executive presence expert. His insights empower leaders to communicate effectively and authentically.